iChat
by PrincessPurplee
Summary: A selection of Facebook, Text, Email and IM conversations between the iCarly characters. Seddie fluff, Sam/Freddie R
1. iSeddie Facebook

**A/N: Hola Amigos & Amigas **

**I know I **really_, really__**, really**_ **shouldn't make a new story, but . . . Oh, shush.**

**I have a sprained wrist, but I really have to write this. It's literally killing me.**

**Sam Puckett**

At The Smoothie with Fredwardo & Carlotta, if the Nub doesn't shut up then I'm bringing out the Butter Sock -.-

_· Like · Comment · 8 minutes ago · _

_Gibby Gibson, Wendy Carter and 1 other like this._

**Freddie Benson **_6 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Shut up, Sam. Technically you did ask for it. You said 'What up, Fredward?'

**Sam Puckett **_3 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

I was just trying to be nice and ask you, I didn't actually care

**Freddie Benson **_1 minute ago· Like · Comment ·_

That wasn't nice! You thumped me after I told you about the Tech Convention!

**Sam Puckett **_2 seconds ago· Like · Comment ·_

That's it, I'm getting the Butter Sock out. Run, Fredward. Run.

**Freddie Benson**

Ow. Just got a whole new array of bruises from the Butter Sock. Don't know how I'm gonna explain these ones to my Mom.

_· Like · Comment · 5 minutes ago _

_Sam Puckett and Tori Vega like this._

**Gibby Gibson **_4 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

Feel sorry for you, man. I would've stayed, but then Sam got the butter sock out, and, well . . . I didn't wanna stay around for that.

**Freddie Benson **_4 minutes ago__· Like · Comment ·_

Nah, its fine. I understand. I wouldn't have stayed if I wasn't threatened with a year's worth of Butter Sock Poundings in one day . . .

**Tori Vega **_3 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Aah, how I miss Sam . . .

**Freddie Benson **_2 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Yeah, miss her like you miss a rash?

**Sam Puckett **_2 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

As if you just compared me to a rash, Benson. You better watch your back.

**Jade West **_1 minute ago· Like · Comment ·_

Sam! We should meet up some time, exchange some methods? I like this idea of the Butter Sock

**Freddie Benson **_34 seconds ago· Like · Comment ·_

Aah,Chizz

**Sam Puckett is married to Spencer Shay.**

_· Like · Comment · 34 minutes ago_

_Gibby Gibson, Carly Shay, Josh Nichols and 8 others like this._

**Freddie Benson **_29 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Seriously? Are you two, like, going out?

**Sam Puckett **_28 minutes ago__· Like · Comment · _

For a smart person, you are actually incredibly stupid :'D No, he's like my big brother. It's a joke, Fredweird.

**Spencer Shay **_25 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Ahahahhaahhahahhahahhhah, imagine that. We'd be . . . SPAM. Oh, God! AHAHAH, SPAM!

**Freddie Benson **_24 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

Oh

**Spencer Shay **_23 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

We thought that since me and Jayne broke up, we'd put a new relationship status for fun ;')

**Sam Puckett **_21 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

Jealous, Freduccini?;)

**Freddie Benson**_ 20 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

PAHHAHAHA, no. Why would I be jealous of you and Spence?

**Sam Puckett **_19 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

Don't know, you tell me. You're the one who's been take over by the green-eyed monsterrrr :-D

**Freddie Benson **_17 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

I have brown eyes actually, Princess Puckett.

**Sam Puckett **_16 minutes ago· Like · Comment ·_

It took you two minutes to come up with that come-back? It shouldn't even be classed as a come-back!

**Spencer Shay **_16 minutes ago · 5 people like this_

Oh, the sexual tension is too much to bear!

**Stacey**** Dillsen**_15 minutes ago__· Like · Comment ·_

NOOOOO! Creddie Schould be together! Schpencher Schay!

**Sam Puckett **_14 minutes ago __· Like · Comment ·_

Who the chizz are you? Get off this status before I hit you with the butter sock! And there is no way that Carly will ever get with Fredlump. Never ever ever ever ever. The day Carly gets with Freddie is the day I kiss Frederly

**Carly Shay **_13 minutes ago __· Like · Comment ·_

But, Sam . . .

**Sam Puckett **_12 minutes ago __· Like · Comment ·_

Don't even.

**Freddie Benson **_11 minutes ago __· Like · Comment ·_

HEY!

**Sam Puckett** _11 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Bye.

**Carly Shay **_10 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

Who is this Stacey chick?

**Stacey Dillsen **_10 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

I am the biggescht Creddier! Everytime there ish a Creddie Schip moment on Icarly, I'm the one to put it schtwaight up on Schpwash Fasche.

**Carly Shay **_ 6 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

. . . What?

**Stacey Dillsen **_5 minutes ago · Like · Comment ·_

I like Cotton Budsch

**A/N: So, what do you think? The next chapter is going to be a text conversation between our dear Fredward and Samantha But only if you like this chapter.**

**If you recognise who 'Stacey Dillsen' is, you get a free year's supply of washing-up liquid and a unicorn! Get reviewing, people **

**-Ellie'xox**


	2. iSeddie Text

**A/N: Hey there. So, here I am. Updating. Again. How nice am I, please? So, yeah, I really don't know where this came from but here it is. Enjoy **

Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly, however I do own a Labradoodle. His name is Raffa.

Hey,nub

_**Why do you feel the need to irritate me so much? :/**_

How long is a giraffe's neck?

_**Well, it ranges on the age and height of the giraffe, generally. Anyway, isn't the phrase 'How long is a piece of string'?**_

And you wonder why I laugh at you for being a dork . . . :')

_**Seriously, why?**_

-,-

_**Is that supposed to be a ninja?**_

It will be soon, if you don't shut your tech-talking mouth

_**YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TEXT ME FIRST!**_

Oh,shush. Carly is at another art lesson, and Spencer is at the scrap yard again

_**What for?**_

Just for fun

_**Oh. Why aren't you with him?**_

Well,I was. And then he got all chizzy because I was 'picking up junk wrong'. Then he walked off and hooked up with this hobo, he ended up taking her home . . . *shudders*

_**I wondered what all of this noise was …**_

Yeahh..

_**So what do you want me to do?**_

Make me non-lonely

_**How?**_

Well,come to my house or something?

_**And why?**_

Because I don't like being lonely,duh

_**Where are the rest of the demons? Did they finally finish their missions to make innocent people's lives a misery and mentally disturb students and teachers? Would've thought that you'd hae been well done with that, by now.**_

You done with your little rant,Fredpear?

_**Yes. And Fredpear?**_

Youre all techy and techy chizz reminds me of the Pear Store, PearPhones, etc, etc.

_**WOW, Sam, you used 'etc' in the correct way!**_

Yeah, you proud?

_**Of course! :D**_

_**Anyway, I can't come over to your house. A) my mom is in, and she wouldn't let me go out, as I didn't take my tick yesterday and I didn't wear a belt today. She thinks that if I go a day without a tick bath, then I will immediately get ticks. And if I don't wear a belt, my pants will fall, therefore exposing my Galaxy War underwear. And B) I don't really want to see your mom and her new boyfriend . . . **_

Actually, this one isn't that bad . . . But TMI Fredford, TMI. I did NOT need to know about your Galaxy Wars underpantaloones.

_**Sorry**_

It's cool

_**If I were allowed out, I still wouldn't be able to go; my Mom would flip if she found out I was going to everyone's favourite delinquent's house.**_

I'm your fave delinquent? :3

_**How many delinquents do I know?**_

Well, there's me . . . and Gibby.

_**Gibby is not a delinquent . . .**_

The boy is a mermaid! That's got to count for something!

_**Sam! Gibby is not a mermaid!**_

How do you know? He ALWAYS takes his shirt off! Never his pants . . .

_**Well, who just randomly takes their pants off?**_

My mom's new boyfriend!

_**Sam . . . You should, like, call the police or something . . .**_

Probably . . .

_**But you gotta hand it to him, he's started taking his shirt off a lot less recently . . .**_

So? Maybe he lost his powers?

_**SAM! Gibby is NOT a mermaid!**_

_****_YOU DON'T KNOW.

_**SAM!**_

Yes, Fredbags?

_**Shut up.**_

No-one tells Mama to shut up!

_**Just did.**_

Watch your back, Benson.

_**Will do, Princess Puckett. Now, I hope this entertained you out of your boredom**_

It would, if it wasn't you on the other side of the conversation

_**Where's your mom?**_

Guess.

_**Bar?**_

EH! You are incorrect, please guess again!

_**Under 21's Dance club?**_

Not today . . . One more go and then you're out.

_**Strip club?**_

FREDWARD.

_**Sorry! She could be anywhere! There's such a wide range!**_

Sigh. Just come over, pleaseeeee?

_**SAMANTHA PUCKETT SAYING PLEASE? What is life? :O**_

Shush, Benson. Just come over. Sneak out or something. I mean, you already wore no belt today, what else have you got to lose?

_**Sam, it's raining. I'd get absolutely soaked.**_

Man up! It's just a little water! And if you drown, you have those mother/son synchronised swimming lessons to help you! ;)

_**Ugh. I'm not coming over, Sam.**_

Fine.

**-10 MINUTES LATER-**

Benson! Open your window!

_**I have lots of windows. And no! My room would probably flood!**_

JUST DO IT. The one connected to the fire escape.

_**The one where we . . .**_

The one where we.

_**Why? Have you got someone ready to paintball me or something? What have you done?**_

Nothing! Just open it, dipthong.

_**Why?**_

Because, if I stay out here for any longer, I'm going to freeze my nicely-shaped butt off! :S

_**You mean your ham butt.**_

Ham is nice.

_**SAM! I'm coming. You're so stupid. Why? Why are you so idiotic?**_

Why did the Secret Sea Council chose GIBBY to represent Seattle Mermaids? These are all good questions!

_**Oh, Sam . . .**_

**A/N:Told you it was strange. I know that it wasn't very long, but yanno . . . The economy and stuff . . .**

**Review for more updates!**

People who win a year's worth of washing-up liquid and a unicorn:

_Kezziexx,____, foreverseddie, scewyou, OOTLink, Mel, HeyHeyIt'sEmC, yellowchic4_

**Unfortunately, I was actually referring to Zoey 101, but she was in iStart A Fan War and iHire An Idiot too. Your washing-up liquid and unicorns are in the post!**

REVIEW. NOW.


	3. iSeddie Reactions

**Disclaimer: Yeah, I own iCarly. That's why I'm a 12 year old girl writing her ideas for it on a Fanfiction website.**

**Freddie Benson is "in a relationship".**

/ 7 hours ago / 37 people like this / Like / Comment /

**Gibby Gibson / Carly Shay likes this /**

WHO WITH?

**Carly Shay**

OHMYGOSH FREDDIE!

**Marissa Benson **

Don't tell me it's that Carly girl.

**Carly Shay / 5 people like this /**

HELLO -_-

**Freddie Benson **

Sorry about her, Carls. I'll speak to you about it later, I'm still with her now, and she'll probably want to tell you later. Gibbs, man, I'll text you later, unless you want to be told with Carly.

**Gibby Gibson**

I WANT to be told now, but there are some things in life which I guess I'll never get, huh?

**Marissa Benson / 3 people like this /**

FREDWARD LUCAS BENSON, YOU CALL ME RIGHT THIS INSTANT AND TELL ME WHO YOU'RE DATIING AND IF SHE IS WORTHY OF BENSON-LOVE.

**Freddie Benson**

MOM! Benson love? I'll talk to you later. Shouldn't you be working?

**Terrance 'T-Bo' Jetter Bo**

FREDIE, boy! Well done, now who da lucky lady, ay? Am I gon' need to get out the Love Smoothie? HEEY! Want a pretzel from my stick?

**Freddie Benson**

No thanks, Teebs, I'll say a bit later

**Sam Puckett**

You're a nub.

**Freddie Benson is "in a relationship" with Sam Puckett.**

/ 5 hours ago / Carly Shay, Goopy Gilbert and 49 other people like this / Like / Comment /

**Carly Shay **^_^

**Freddie Benson**

Bet she doesn't think I'm all that much of a nub now;)

**Sam Puckett**

Nope, you're still Queen of Nubs. Don't get too cocky, now.

**Freddie Benson**

You love me really ;) x

**Sam Puckett**

Not if you keep saying that. And shush, people might read this. Stop with the kisses to, Dork, I'm not Carly.

**Gibby Gibson**

Hey, Sam, if he's the Queen of Nubs, does that make you King?

**Sam Puckett**

You knows it.

**Spencer Shay**

YES. FINALLY. Now, Fredman, I think we need to have a little talk..

**Freddie Benson**

Sammy, I know you aren't Carly :') There are a few different ways I can tell. Spence, I'll come over later. Just left with Sam, we're at my place, and it won't be that easy to chat when you have a Sam punching you on the mouth.

**Spencer Shay**

That's what we need to talk about.. Lip-punching and the like..

**Sam Puckett**

Well, you two girlies have fun with that. I'll go get some fried chicken so you two can have your gossip session.

**Spencer Shay**

No, no, I want a chat with you too, 'Sammy'.

**Freddie Benson**

Uh'm, okay, I'll be over in about a half hour, that cool with you Spence?

**Spencer Shay**

See you then kiddos, have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do

**Sam Puckett**

Well, that leaves us a lot to do, doesn't it? ;)

**Goopy Gilbert**

SEDDIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!

**(A/N: I'm posting a one-shot about Spencer's 'little chat', if you get what I mean. Feel free to read it and review t, if you'd like. Hows abouts its?)**

**Sam Puckett**

+the Nub

/ 5 hours ago / Melanie Puckett, Tasha Evans and 5 others like this / Like / Comment /

**Freddie Benson**

x3

**Sam Puckett**

Stop it, Nerd.

**Freddie Benson**

Whatchagonnado? ;P

**Sam Puckett**

Get you off that darn phone so you can't send me any more hearts. It's border-line stalkerish.

**Freddie Benson**

Well, as role of Samantha Joy Puckett's boyfriend, I believe that I do own the rights to send her as many hearts as I wish.

**Sam Puckett**

Not if I throw your phone off the eighth floor of Bushwell. Hmmm, I wonder how I could manage to do that, sitting here on the fire escape of Apartment 8D of Bushwell Plaza.

**Freddie Benson**

You wouldn't dare.

**Sam Puckett**

Oh, really? Is that a challenge I hear?

**Carly Shay**

Play nice, Sam.

**Sam Puckett**

He shouldn't have doubted me, then, should he? Now he's alone an phoneless, oops.

**Sam Puckett created the note, "How to Get Along With a Puckett".**

How to get along with a Puckett:

Rule 1 – DO NOT challenge us. (Unless you like losing. We stand up for ourselves and we always win.)

Rule 2 – DO NOT doubt us. (We know our way around; we will either beat the doubt out of you or prove you wrong.)

Rule 3 – Keep your distance. (We like personal space, 'nuff said. )

Rule 4 –DO NOT attempt an argument. (At risk of death or wanting to lose.)

Rule 5 – DO NOT mess with our friends. (If you value your limbs.)

Figure out the rest for yourself.

/ 4 hours ago / Pam Puckett and 18 others like this / Like / Comment /

**Spencer Shay / 4 people like this /**

Feel sorry for Freddie.

**Melanie Puckett**

HEY! We aren't all like that!

**Freddie Benson**

Sammy, we need to go see Spencer. And I'm sorry for doubting you. Let me make it up to you later? My Mom has a late shift tonight

**Marissa Benson **

FRDWARD.

**Freddie Benson**

Damn, so close. Er, we were having a study date tonight, Mom.

**Marissa Benson / 4 people like this /**

I'll be watching you. I love you.

**Freddie Benson / 2 people like this /**

I love you too, Mom. :l

**A/N: Love it? Hate it? Yeah, I'll post the one-shot about the whole birds and the bees chat with our lovely Spencer later today. Be sure top review it!**

**I'm doing shout-outs to all of my reviewers I the next chapter, and **_**answering all questions**__**.**_** SO, be sure to send some in! They can be about the story, my opinions, my pets, my shampoo, anything!**

**Review . . . for the children.**


	4. iSeddie Text II

**Disclaimer: If you love something, set it free. If it loves you, it'll come back. But, if it doesn't, then it was never yours in the first place. I set iCarly free the other day, and I watched as it happily flew to the council estate over near Tesco's. It still hasn't come back. Huh, I guess it got hit by a bus or something, maybe a taco truck.**

**Chapter 4 – iSeddie Texts II**

Hey, you coming to mine later, Nub?

**I would but . . . No offence, but I don't wanna see your mom parading around in her new bikini again. Not after last time, she was all like "Oh, Fred! Look how lovely my buzums look in this!" I'm never getting it out of my mind again.**

None taken.. She's my Mom but she sure is a chizzy one. How do I put up with her, you ask? I don't.

**Aha, so do you wanna come to mine? My Mom is out again: )**

I would but I can't. I'm out somewhere tonight, but I'll come round when it finishes. Just text for now?

**Is that place, by any chance, detention, Sam? ; ) And sure, no problemo. Thanks for the new phone by the way, although you broke my last one . . . And technically you didn't do anything to get the new one, you just threatened my mom that you would marry me and have Little Sams until she agreed to buy me a new one.**

Not this time.. And, shush, you know you love it Benson.

**Ooh, so where you going? Not going out with a secret boyfriend, ay?**

As cute as jealousy looks on you, Dork, it's not a good thing. Trust me, I've had years of it with Carly.

**Stop trying to distract me. Where ya goinggg? : )**

Outtt : )

**Fine, don't tell me then: (**

Stop whining, Puckett boyfriends don't whine.

**Please tell me?**

Nope.

**Pretty please?**

Not happening.

**Please, please, please with bacon on top?**

You're a nub. I'm not telling you, you'd make fun of me. I'll just stop texting you, then; )

**Sammy, text me: ( Just tell me, won't laugh. And why would I laugh? What is it?**

**Baby? Is it Tutoring or something? xx**

**Sammmmmyyy D: xx**

Stop putting kisses, Nub, people might think I actually like you. And no, it isn't tutoring; I get that from you, Idiot. It's dancing. Laugh and I'm getting the butter sock out.

**As if, Sam! Tell me what you're really doing! Well done on the semi-colon there too.**

I'm really going to dancing. Remember the pageant? Well, I'm doing another one of them and I'm going to see my old teacher and choreographer about it. I haven't been 'shopping with my Mom' or in detention every Tuesday night like you think, I've been there. Before you go all whiny and 'WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?' on me, I do trust you but I just wanted to keep it to myself. Now begin your rant.

**Aw, Lil' Samantha does dancing :3 What style?**

What? No rant? No calling me to yell at me for keeping things from you?

**Nope, but why would I do that?**

Because that's what couples usually do, on TV, in movies and at school and all.

**Well, we're not exactly a normal couple, not are we Sammy?**

True story, bro.

**Tell it again?**

Is there a sequel?

**Anyway, what style do you do? I know you do tip or something from that pageant. I watched the video online, it was really good, Sam:)**

Thanks, Nub. And it's tap; ) But I'm not doing tap tonight, I'm doing ballet.

**Really? Don't ballet dancers have to be, like, graceful?**

If I'm not graceful then what am I?

**Uh'm . . . Sam-ish?**

I'll accept it, but next time, Nub.

**I'll survive with the pain. Anyways, what time you getting out of ballet?**

8: 30

**Jeez,when does it start?**

6: 30

**Can you come over before then? I'm so bored without you : (**

Aw,cute. Fine, I'm walking round now

**I'll get the bacon.**

I'll get the air

**Alright, see you in a bit. Love you like a fat person loves cake xx**

Love you like Sam loves ham,xx

By the way, saviour that text, those kisses aren't happening for a while again

**Will do**

: )

**A/N: Not my longest chapter, but oh well.**

**Thanks to **_**Mel**_**,**_** seddiejathan1020, DramioneForever123, JadedAttitute143, x3Before . x . The . x . Stormx3,Haha164, Mrs Freddie Benson, HeyHeyIt'sEmC **_**and**_** jesus.**_

**x3Before . x . The . x . Stormx3: Thanks, it's good to know people like my story I'm just finishing the Spencer Talk story this second, actually.**

**HeyHeyIt'sEmC: **That it is ; ) I was watching it while writing this, and I was like, "Hey, let's somehow incorporate this into my story, that could go well. And, by the way, I absolutely loved your review. I was walking along the corridor in school on the way to Games and I checked my phone for emails and I burst out laughing. And the most part of my friends (Ehlana, Alicia, Jess, Kieran, Brad, Kelly, Milly, Ellie, Rowan, Dave, Sara, Dan, Carol, Georgia, etc), my Mum, my Nan and more know about you and your brilliant review.

**Haha164: **Yep, I am 12. I'm cute _and_ adorable, it's almost like a package deal. Just to point it out ; )

**Jesus: **loving the username. And, yes, do PRAISE the lord.

**OOTLink:** I genuinely think you're hilarious because of the message you sent me about the unicorns and the washing-up liquid. I love you, end of.

**Like my story? Review me. Don't like my story? Review me. Like jam? Review me? Got a new haircut? Review me. The world ending? JUST REVIEW ME, GAWD.**

**Keep sending questions.**


	5. iSeddie BreakUp

**A/N: Hey there, stranger.**

***IMPORTANT* Recently I've noticed quite a few stories which are similar to the type of story this is go up on Fanfiction about Seddie. Please please****please**_**please**_** (with bacon on top) don't stop reading and reviewing this story! Because I love you all, and I have some spare washing-up liquid in the cupboard (ahem c; )**

**Disclaimer: Must I say it again?**

***THIS IS JUST AFTER THE SEDDIE BREAK-UP***

**Sam Puckett** went from "in a relationship" to "single".

/ at 12: 36 am / Jonah Albert and 23 others like this / Like / Comment /

**Carly Shay** WHAT?

**Sam Puckett **I dumped the nub's sorry butt

**Carly Shay **WHYWHYWHY?:(

**Sam Puckett **He wasn't worth my time, plus we argues too much, as you said, we weren't a normal couple.

**Carly Shay **Are things gonna be awkward?

**Sam Puckett **Nope, ankle swear

**Marissa Benson **YES! Finally, my Freddiekins is away from that no good gutter-girl!

**Sam Puckett **Hey there, Crazy. I'd get off my status before I get out the butter sock.

**Carly Shay **SAM! As crazy as Mrs. Benson is, you can't use the butter sock on her! It's impolite!

**Stacey Dillsen **YESH! NOW CREDDIE CAN GET TOGETHER AND DATE AND ALL IS BACK TO NORMAL!

**Sam Puckett **Can I use the butter sock on this Stacey chick, Carls?

**Carly Shay **Stacey, look; me and Freddie aren't ever going to get together. Never ever ever ever never. He doesn't like me, I don't like him. And Sam, it's never okay to use the butter sock. On ANYONE.

**Sam Puckett **Carlsssss : (

**Carly Shay **Saaammmmm : ) Oh, and call me, where are you? I don't remember you leaving my place

**Sam Puckett **I went over to Freddie's and dumped him at 10 then went back to mine. I needed new clothes, anyway. I'd been using yours' and Freddie's for a week or so because of my mom's new bf of the week

**Carly Shay **the builder?

**Sam Puckett **the ice-cream truck dude

**Carly Shay **Oh. I still can't believe she did that thing for him..

**Sam Puckett **I know, it was just creepy

**Spencer Shay **Aw, kiddo : ( Come over a bit later and chat?

**Carly Shay **Please, Spencer, you just want to deets.

**Spencer Shay / Sam Puckett and 3 others like this like this / **True, but I also want to know if Lil' Samantha is okay : ( She's like my little sister, you know. Love chu Sam x3

**Sam Puckett **Okay, first, DO NOT CALL ME LITTLE SAMANTHA. And second, love chu too Spence x3

**Spencer Shay **Bu Freddie calls you it : (

**Marissa Benson **What's the butter sock?

**Carly Shay **Oh, Mrs. Benson . . .

**Sam Puckett changed her profile picture.**

Me and the Gibster ; ) Got tired of the nub on my profile..

/ 39 minutes ago / 22 people like this / Like / Comment /

**Gibby Gibson **Who's that handsome young duck?

**Sam Puckett **Why, I do believe that is Sam Puckett

**Carly Shay **Aw, you two are cute

**Gibby Gibson **We know

**Sam Puckett **Ew.

**Spencer Shay **Nice moustache, Sam

**Sam Puckett **my moustache thanks you

**Melanie Puckett **You moved on that fast? Gosh, Sam. Well, since you've moved on, can I have Freddie? He's SO cute!

**Sam Puckett **EW. Me and Gibby aren't dating! God, I sound like Carls saying ew. And NO YOU CAN NOT. Why would you want a nub like him? Text me!

**Freddie Benson **You're real? Sam, that's stupid. I can't believe you would go to the trouble of creating a fake account just to fool me while you've already told me she isn't real.

**Sam Puckett **Get a grip, Fredlumps. She is real; I just said she isn't to shut you up.

**Melanie Puckett **FREDDIE!

**Sam Puckett** –.-

**Melanie Puckett **I texted you, Sam! Oh and I'm coming back for spring break! YAY!

**Freddie Benson **Still don't believe you

**Sam Puckett **Well, you should.

**Melanie Puckett **Wanna meet us together?

**Sam Puckett **UGH.

**Freddie Benson **Sure. Groovie Smoothie in 10. See you there, SAM.

**Freddie Benson **OHMYGOD THERE'S TWO OF HER.

/ 4 minutes ago / Melanie Puckett likes this / Like / Comment /

**Melanie Puckett **TOLD YOU ^_^

**Sam Puckett **UGH.

**Freddie Benson **That means I kissed Melanie.. Oh my God.

**Sam Puckett **So, you've kissed her, too? Damn, Benson. You trying to make your way around the Puckett family?

**Freddie Benson **EW.

**Freddie Benson **to **Sam Puckett (via PM)**

**Freddie Benson **Hey, Puckett. Sorry about the whole Melanie thing. Guess you were right . . . Uh, anyway, do you have a thing with Gibby?

**Sam Puckett **Well, that's for me to know and you to NOT find out.

**Freddie Benson **I KNEW IT. Seriously, Sam? I thought that maybe, just MAYBE, you might have actually liked me. Maybe not. What happened to that 'someday'? That already out the window, hey?

**Sam Puckett **Jeez, Benson. I was just chizzin' with ya, you don't need to overreact like that. Stop being such a damn daffodil and calm the chizz down : ' )

**Freddie Benson **Oh. Okay then. Awesome. So, uh, bye..

**Sam Puckett **See ya, Fredderly.

**Sam Puckett**

yellow mustard is pretty awesome.

/ 7 minutes ago / Tori Vega, Shelby Marx and 1 other like this. / Like / Comment /

**Freddie Benson **Why? Just because it belongs on food doesn't make it awesome, Sam

**Sam Puckett **In my book it does. Heck, in my book, anything that can relate to food in ANY WAY is awesome

**Freddie Benson **True.

**Sam Puckett **plus, they're making yellow fatcakes now. That's gotta count for something.

**Freddie Benson **Yellow fat cakes?

**Gibby Gibson **Sam, are you coming over later to finish that thing?

**Freddie Benson **Helllooooooooo?

**Sam Puckett **Sure, Gibbs. Give me a sec, just gotta finish up this fatcake then I'll be on my way. NO WAIT. You pick me up, I can't be bothered walking today

**Gibby Gibson **you NEVER have the effort to walk

**Sam Puckett **True that

**Freddie Benson **HELLO?

**A/N: Love? Hate? Feel like some chocolate milk? COOL, now tell me that in a review.**

**Thanks to kissmeintherain, iCarlySeddiejathan, PrincessRotation, xCoolxStoryxBrox, BetterThanGold, HeyHeyIt'sEmC, Haha164, Seddie, CatherineObvi0us and Essex Seddie.**

_**iCarlySeddiejathan:**_ I have 2 dogs, 3 cats, 2 fish, 1 chinchilla, 2 hamsters, 1 hedgehog, 2 rabbits and 2 guinea-pigs. Yeah, my house is like a zoo, it's ridiculous.

_**xCoolxStoryxBrox:**_ I was at home and I was basically like, "Hey, guys. I need a new story – like I don't already have thirteen stories on the go." So I started writing one about iCarly on the beach and I was like, "Pahahahah, no." So, I got to procrastinating (Facebook) and I was like, "HEY." And then I crapped this out. It's a magical process, isn't it? Thanks for reviewing!

_**HeyHeyIt'sEmC:**_ Thanks for that lovely long review! HEY LOOK, I INCLUDED THE MUSTARD THING. And to your reply to my reply to your reply (I think that's right), I'm the same, I go to a Grammar school and I go absolutely mad at my friends when they use incorrect grammar or spelling. It's actually kind of sad. Sigh. About the Jennette thing, same here! I'm actually addicted. She can sing, she can dance, she can act, she can ice-skate . . . CAN SHE FLY? I hate Jam. I haven't the slightest clue about that damn chicken, though, but maybe if the thing wasn't so damn mentally messed-up, it could stay on the same damn side of the road.

_**CatherineObvi0us: **_Good. I think.

_**Seddie: **_It's up C:

**REVIEW ME, YOU UN-ATTRACTIVE FRENCH TALKER.**

**P.S. Review what you want I the next chapter & ask me questions again. I like questions.**

**P.P.S. Hopefully this cheered you up. Today is the LAST EVER filming of iCarly. My tears are salty, did you know that? I like the way they taste.**

**P.P.P.S. Now for the shameless advertising . . . I'm putting up a Seddie Angst story soon, I hope you will read & enjoy it! I don't do a lot of angst, but I'm too sad to write humour sometimes, so BOOM.**


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